W4F begins the day with Good Ol' J.R. and Jerry "The King" Lawler in a heated discussion about the events the past few days and the big event, King of the Ring...
*~*J.R*~*
Well, King, here we are, one day to King of the Ring!
*~*Lawler*~*
Yup, J.R.! I can't wait! I am looking forward to it...
*~*J.R*~*
Some interesting events have unfolded over the last couple of days...In the match of Gravedigger and The Heartbreak Kid, Shawn Michael's, we may just see Kidd Rock take the place of HBK with the special referee being Chris Benoit, The Rapid Wolverine...We also saw the departure of Chris Jericho, as well as his fiancé...
*~*Lawler*~*
We lost our kittens!!! J.R., let me tell you, that Kat was a talented young lady...
*~*J.R*~*
Yes, indeed she was, King...Speaking of talented, young ladies, we witnessed some of a date between Molly Holly and Kurt Angle...
*~*Lawler*~*
Angle isn't good enough for Molly if you ask me...
*~*J.R*~*
Well, King, no one asked you...
Just then, the lights in the sold out arena begin to fade and the fans get to their feet, looking at the entrance in anticipation...
The spots begin flashing and "My Way" blares from the speakers. Mostly boos come from the crowd, but there seem to be a few cheers mixed in as the fans know that it's Lita's music. She steps out of the entrance and the negative reaction grows stronger. As she begins striding down the ramp, J.R. and "The King" pipe up...
*~*J.R*~*
Last night, we got to take an intimate glimpse into the lives of Lita and Lance Storm...
*~*Lawler*~*
Oh yea it was intimate! Did you see her in that towel?
They roll footage of the scenes from Lita and Lance's private suite; Lance scowling at the note on the flowers, fumbling around for his pants, and asking Lita to marry him...
*~*J.R*~*
I dunno, King, I think Lita may be wrong with the assumption that Lance is the one giving her all of those flowers...I mean, there was that complete invasion of privacy, someone spying on Lita in the shower...
*~*Lawler*~*
J.R., That image will be forever burned in my brain...
*~*J.R*~*
I wonder if Lita is going to tell us her answer...
*~*Lawler*~*
Well, if she says no, she is fair game!!!
Continuing down the ramp, the boos do nothing more than put an amused look on Lita's face...it's almost as if she feeds from it. She dives into the ring and jumps up on the ropes, doing her customary "four corner salute."
She jumps down and flashes the guns, her two fingers representing both the Women's and European title. She motions for a mic and Lillian Garcia hands her one as she goes to the center of the ring. She waits for the crowd to cease their "Slut!" chants before speaking...
*~*Lita*~*
Some of you may wonder why I don't bring my belts out here with me. Well, I'll tell you why...Because you Neanderthals don't deserve to look at them! Now, you all probably think that I came out here to announce if I accepted Lance's proposal, and well, as much as it truly hurts me to say this, but you idiots aren't going to find out any sooner than anyone else around here, so just forget about me telling you my answer!
She laughs and the crowd boos...
*~*Lita*~*
Anyways, on to more important business. First of all, let me say that thus far I am tres impressed with Gravedigger...So far, a job well done, keep it up if you know what's good for you my friend. As for my match at King of the Ring against the Genetic Freak, Scott Steiner...
The fans instantly begin cheering, as they would rather see Steiner advance over Lita...
*~*Lita*~*
Shut up, you idiots! How could you cheer for that hideous monster? I mean, come on, that man spends his free time popping steroids like candy and becoming "friendly" with his right hand! He is a loser! Which brings me to the stipulation part of our match...
Once again, the morons in the back are all demanding the big, flashy matches, and once again, I will keep mine simple...well, fairly simple anyways...You have all heard to cage matches, well, ours will be a cage match. Only instead of the winner being in the cage and having to escape to win, this match will take place on top of the cage...the first person to be thrown, tossed or fall off of the top of the cage not only is the loser, but gets a 4 day 3 night all expenses paid trip to Cedar Sinai Hospital. Yes, Scotty, immediately following our match, you will be whisked away in style~an ambulance! From there you will check into Cedar's and be taken to your own private room~in the intensive care unit! During your stay, you will be fed gourmet cuisine from a feeding tube. Hell, you won't even have to get up to use the bathroom, as you will have a bedpan by your side, which will pale in comparison to the catheter and bag you have attached to your unit. You will get plenty of rest and be supplied with all of the morphine you can handle...Sounds nice, doesn't it, Scotty?



While I am celebrating my victory at the hot spots in town, you will be watching all of the action from your room in the antiseptic blandness of the hospital. You see, you may have size on strength on me, but I am lithe, which puts you at a slight disadvantage. I hope this week you have been doubling your dose of poison and pumping iron because as you are now, well let's just say that you will have a lot of rehabilitation to do. You could always make this easier on yourself, I mean, you are going to lose anyways, so might as well stay home and save yourself the trouble. And let me warn you now...I'd leave that little whore Midajah in the back for this one because if she tries to come down here and interfere, there will be a member of DX that will take care of her! Besides, why would you want to subject her to the horror and mayhem of her boyfriend crumpling on the floor in pain, not able to move...
Tomorrow night, I will advance and hold the World title once again, as I did at the height of my career last year...Don't count me out of this, Steiner, not yet...Remember, winning isn't everything, it's the only damn thing, and if you ain't down with that, then I got two words for ya~SUCK IT!!!
She goes to drop the mic but raises it to her lips again...
*~*Lita*~*
Oh, and Scotty, the match is no DQ...Now hit my music...
Limp starts to play over the PA as she drops the mic and fans begin to boo again. She turns to exit the ring when all of a sudden her music is interrupted by a deep, booming voice...
*~*Voice*~*
Ahhh, my dear, sweet Lita...Lance isn't good enough for you. You will soon realize that it is I who should be the man to please you, to hold you, to love you...
His voice fades outs to his sick laughter as Lita just stands there, an odd look on her face. She just can't seem to place the voice. The camera cuts to J.R. and "The King" as Lita rolls out of the ring and ascends the ramp.
*~*J.R.*~*
Who the hell is that? This is just plain sadistic, folks...
The W4F fades to commercial to a shot to Lawler shrugging his shoulders...
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